One of the downsides of being a virile Muslim living in LA, is that I am often subjected to unwanted sexual advances from female celebrities.
Take yesterday for instance. I was innocently documenting the layout of a famous hotel for umm… a “future project” when who accosts me, but none other than Nickelodeon star Victoria Justice.
Victoria Justice asked me if I was “here for the gang bang”, before inviting me into her hotel room (as you can see in the video above). I followed her in hoping I could find a blunt object to unleash some Islamic justice with, but instead found 2 dozen black guys and potential witnesses so I made a graceful exit.